If there is one thing that I have learned in the years that I have been married to my husband is that all marriages have their ups and downs. Many things can cause those rough patches. But the number one thing that I find that can cause an issue in a marriage is money. I never realized that more than when I wasn’t working and my husband was the only working. Don’t get me wrong my husband is a hardworking man and he did what he needed to do to get us a float. He has gotten a second job on numerous occasions. He had one recently too because the job market was not being kind to me. I appreciate everything that he has done for us.
With the trials and tribulations that we have been through I have learned a few things. Money can definitely cause a lot of problems in a marriage. These are the things that I have learned that could cause a rift in a marriage:
- Overspending: Sometimes we want what we want. So sometimes we are willing to forget about certain bills just to get that one item that we feel we need. Even if it is one person who does it, it can cause problems in a relationship. Cause it can put a couple into debt. One way is to set each other with an allowance.
- Not budgeting: If you don’t budget you can definitely wind up in the hole because you are not making it or just barely making it. This can be very stressful. Especially with one spouse working. So it is a great idea to set up a budget with the bills. My husband and I organize our bills as much as we can.
- No savings: Not saving for a rainy day. Sometimes things happen that are out of control. You can have a car breakdown or a medical emergency. So it is a great idea to have some money put away.
- Living paycheck to paycheck: This is something that my husband and I have been doing for years. We have been just making it. Again he made enough and still makes enough to sustain the household but sometimes when times get rough it can be pretty stressful. Sometimes just barely getting by isn’t enough.
- Living above your means: Sometimes we have a way we want our life to go. We want that big house or that expensive cars. We see opportunity to get it and don’t think about how it will affect us in the future. So that SUV with the $800 per month payments that sounded like a great idea at the time you got it doesn’t make sense now that you have to make the mortgage payment and the car payment.
By planning your finances with your spouse and being careful you can avoid most of these situations. This is when communication comes in. Having your finances straight can actually strengthen your marriage.