I have come to the conclusion that there are some people in this world who just want to be miserable. It’s like there is absolutely nothing in the world that will ever make them happy. Even if they are happy at some point it doesn’t seem to last long. It seems that they can just never pull themselves out of whatever is making them miserable so they decide to try to take others down with them.
I have decided that those who want to be miserable can be miserable by themselves. Cause all the effort you put into trying to help someone not be miserable can pretty much be spent else where. Then you become their entire source of happiness and that can break a person. If you jump through one hoop for them they expect you to jump through another and another. Yes if you do something that someone doesn’t like you can correct it. But when it becomes a constant thing at some point you have to ask yourself where is the line. See the problem is with miserable people you will find that pretty much anything can make them unhappy. It’s not hard to upset them at all. Something as simple as telling them no to something can set them off or not agreeing with something they say. I honestly think being miserable can be contagious. When you are around someone who is constantly unhappy it’s pretty easy to become unhappy yourself. I have on occasion found myself suddenly just being unhappy because someone was unhappy for whatever reason. Sometimes I have been unhappy because I made someone else unhappy. Because I’m the type of person who internalizes everything I then become unhappy. I just don’t want to carry that kind of energy with me anymore. For me to move on to the next step in my life I can’t be miserable. But in all honesty if someone wants to be happy they have to do their own work. I’m not talking about people who are dealing with mental illness. I’m talking about people who are willing walking around angry and upset.
So in order for me to not be miserable I’m going to make sure I do things that will make me happy or find time to write it down. I am working on not internalizing things. The main thing I’m going to do is continue to realize that it’s not my job to make a miserable person happy that all I can do is be me and improve myself where necessary but not make it my mission to try to make people happy. That is a job is too big for anyone. My only job is to make me happy. I just no longer have the time or energy to continue to try to make others happy. I also realize that if the person who is miserable is close to you it doesn’t mean that you have to end your relationship. It just means you need to protect yourself more. Just don’t let them being miserable consume you. You can be there to support them through whatever they are going through. You can correct anything that you did hurt them but it’s up to them to move on. You can even encourage them to go talk to someone but ultimately the decision is their own. I just had to realize it’s just not my job. I will however be there when they need a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear. I can give advice when they need it but I have to maintain my own sanity.