La La Land Mommy: 3 Reasons Dropping The Mic Doesn’t Work In Relationships
I pride myself on being an open and caring person. But I have to admit that sometimes I am not the best at dealing with my emotions. There are times where I want to just tell The Husband how I feel and that be it. Although I know that really isn’t possible. Cause of course in relationships especially marriages you can’t just say something and completely walk away. Because I struggle with expressing myself sometimes I have the tendency to wait until I am fed up before I speak on something that is bothering me. I call these “drop mic” moments. Drop mic usually means when you are on stage at an event that requires a microphone you say something either amazing or shocking, drop the mike, and then walk off. For me this means just dumping whatever is on my chest off. But I know that isn’t the right way to handle things. So I am working on doing more talking rather than waiting until I get fed up.
A drop mic situation can be done in different ways. If you send your spouse a text filled with something that is bothering you like them wanting to purchase something like a blowjob machine as an insult to you, and then you refuse to respond to them because you are angry which isn’t giving them a chance to either acknowledge your feelings, apologize, or explain themselves then you are having a drop mic moment. Not saying that you can’t calm down and then come back to it later but to just drop the situation and never address it then yeah you are having a drop mic moment. If you are like me and hold things in until you can’t take it anymore then you are having a drop mic moment. The truth is these moments actually don’t belong in relationships. I know they will be had though. But here are the reasons that I don’t think they belong in relationships especially mine.
- It doesn’t solve anything: Just dropping information on someone and walking away won’t solve your problem. It will still be there when you come back.
- It’s disrespectful: Okay it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this out. But yeah if you don’t like it done to you don’t do it to anyone else. I hate when a issue comes up and rather than deal with it I am told what is wrong and then ignored. I’ve done it to The Husband and he has done to me. It eventually gets worked out but yeah it doesn’t feel good.
- It’s not a great form of communication: The person can still miss the message. In fact it can turn into a much bigger argument because of the way you delivered your problem.
If you decide to consider where these relationship issues are spurring up from, you may see some resemblance with your childhood experiences. While you may not want to accept it, you make future relations based on our past relationships, be it with parents, other family members, or friends. As mentioned on The Truly Charming and a few other relationship sites, you can form various forms of attachment in a relationship, like secure, anxious, avoidant, or some other. These attachments can affect your actions in associations, for instance, showing vulnerability, comfortable physical and emotional compatibility, as in secure attachments or jealousy, hypervigilance, and feeling unappreciated in anxious attachments. It could be essential to understand these characteristics and work on them to ensure you have a healthy and happy romantic life. I could say, my drop the mic habit could be an avoidant attribute, and I don’t want it to affect me anymore.
I don’t claim to be an expert. I just noticed something about myself that I thought that I would share with you. All I am saying is that it is better to try to deal with a problem. I am not saying it is not okay to walk away. It’s also not okay to just drop a big bomb and then leave the person to deal with it. Just don’t drop the mic. It sometimes makes things final.
Have you ever had a drop mic situation?
Earlier in our relationship I may have had a couple of mic drop moments, but these days I have to think a lot more before I speak. The longer you know someone the more thoughtful you have to be. You have no excuses to be insensitive or rash.
Eva recently posted…Prince Dies at 57 #RIPPrince
Yep. I’m learning this too.
I used to be extremely stubborn so I would have “drop the mic” moments regularly. I am thankful for growth because now I want to always talk about issues as much as possible.
Yes I’m the same way. I like to calm down before tackling an issue. I have the tendency to sometimes to say exactly what is on my mind which isn’t any better than dropping the mic.
I don’t particularly do it with my husband because I learned how to handle him early on in our friendship. I learned that kind of approach doesn’t work but he does genuinely care about how i feel so I just need to say to him how i feel and be open to discuss. But i do, however, do that with my kids and that is just as equally unacceptable because I am teaching them that bad habit. I do it straight outta my emotions, and I am currently working to not be so response to my emotions and learn how to analyze them first before responding. It’s awesome that you realize it and are growing in that area too!!
Oh yes! I’ve so done it with my kids. I’m trying to grow. It is so hard.
Dropping the mic is my technique for dealing with things sometimes. In my mind I know exactly what I want and need to say. In the moment it doesn’t come out that way so I get frustrated and end up dropping the mic.
I need to do better.
I have been there as well. You can’t form the words so you spit it out in frustration and walk away.
It sometimes feels good in the moment but there’s always a price to pay for such behavior.
Paying the price is the part I hate.
I definitely agree with you. My husband and I do pretty well at speaking up before things fester. Great points.
I’m working on communicating more. Sometimes I tend to hold things in.
This is so spot on! In a relationship, dropping the mic does absolutely no good. Communication is necessary to work through any issues and making a huge statement then walking away does the total opposite.
LiveLifeWell,
Allison
I totally agree. It just makes things worse.
Ha! I promise I can sometimes be the mic dropper. Especially if I was right. But you bring up a great point. It solves nothing and isn’t necessary. A resolution is better than the hair flip and walk away (my version of dropping the mic).
Ha ha ha! I love your version of dropping the mic.
Dropping the mic. Yep, definitely used that ineffective strategy before. It felt good for the moment, but the aftertaste is bitter.
Yes it never works out the way you want it to. All it does is cause more chaos.
Yep, I learned it the hard way. Marriage is about working it out and not pulling the trump card lol. No more mic drops for me!
I’m getting there. I’m not actually mic drop free yet.
I think the idea of “dropping the mic” has been glamorized so much that it’s generally seen as a positive thing. But I definitely agree that there is a place for it, and relationships (especially a marriage) is not it.
I totally agree with you. It is shown so much on reality shows and television in general people think it’s the thing to do.
Yesssss! This post is spot on. Thank you for sharing. Loved this.
You’re welcome. I’m known to just dump and run. So not good.
Yesss! Loved this. Thank you for sharing.
You’re welcome.