La La Land Mommy: I’m Fed Up With Just Barely Making It
The cycle never ends. Money comes in and it immediately goes out. It’s very rare that there is anything extra leftover after playing bill roulette. Over the years our financial situation has been through various changes. Heck, it is still going through changes. Some months are better than others. Especially when you are in a one-income household. Being a one-income household is definitely not what The Husband and I planned. But that is basically our current situation. I know that there are many others in our situation and they have looked at various ways that they can build their money up, they’ve even taken a chance at investing and used resources such as this article or talked to a money manager about how they can do that. We just aren’t at that point yet in our financial cycle. I actually feel so guilty when we just barely make bills or can’t do something because we have no extra money. It is a feeling that I simply can’t explain. It places a lot of stress on not just me, but our whole family. Who knew that your finances could have this much of an impact on your life? It is heartbreaking. In fact, there have even been times when I have thought about taking out personal loans, with the help of somewhere like SoFi (find out here for more information) to give us a helping hand and to ensure we can make ends meet. Whilst this is something I never dreamed about doing, I feel like we might not have any choice, especially since it’s our finances in question.
I think I have mentioned from time to time how I have had struggles finding a job. So of course the guilt from not being able to find employment is huge and I know that it is stressful for The Husband. We are just dealing with the situation that we are handed. But just barely making it is just frustrating.Life as a family of four is difficult. Nishe’ is getting closer and closer to graduating and Tyler isn’t far behind. Not only that we all need things. Plus we are constantly trying to dig our way out of debt. It just seems like it is never-ending. You get tired of seeing that perfect outfit and not being able to get it because you don’t have the money or you have to save for a bill. The Husband and I are realizing we need to make some changes and fast. We have decided we are tired of just making it and want to be able to do the things that we love to do, want to do, and need to do. There are even times when we thought of gambling to make some extra money. There are many websites (follow this link to learn more) on the Internet that offer details on how to bag big bonuses, so making money from online casino sites shouldn’t be difficult. The only thing that stops us is the uncertainty of it making or breaking the bank. So we decided to take the safe route of budgeting. I mean we have had a budget before, but it always changes because things pop up. But my ultimate goal is to have us be financially stable within at least five years. When you think of all the changes we have coming up it seems so overwhelming. You never really think about how expensive it is to raise a family until you have the family. Well, at least I didn’t. I know things can be difficult. They say you are never financially ready to have kids but there are ways that you can be prepared. You see so many tips and articles on starting an emergency fund for Vancouverites (and others). Yet, sometimes we forget how important it is to plan financially. There are things that I wish we would’ve done even after we had kids. Things like
- Start a savings account sooner.
- Budgeted better
- Have an emergency fund.
- Start a college fund for our kids.
- Couponing
It’s not too late to start but definitely would’ve been better to have started sooner. That way instead of barely making it we would be in a much better position than we are now. We are going to teach our kids better. Hopefully, they will learn from our mistakes and seeing us make the changes that we plan to make. We no longer want to pay the bill roulette.
How do you feel about your financial situation? Do you think you planned well? Do you think it could use some improvements?
Definitely could have done better. I end up beating my head on the wall some days because I hate the way our finances are. I’ve been working on getting that straightened and can start seeing progress. We still have a few years to go to get it “fixed” and my son graduates next year. Oh the crunch.
Oh yeah beating my head into a wall has been pretty tempting for me as well. It is so hard to find your feet again once they are dragged from under you.
Finances can be really hard. We tend to plan well but we have had several emergencies that have shaken things up in the past. That’s why we think it’s so important to be prepared.
It’s the emergencies that throw you off the most. Those surprises can turn your whole world upside down.
I feel you on this! I’m not sure that anyone ever prepares as well as they think they could have. I know we could have done better looking back on it.
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Yeah just writing it out and seeing that can relate kind of makes me feel better.
Just making it sound like just about every family I know. Unless you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth, just making it seems to be a measure of success these days.
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I totally agree. It has become basically a way of life.
We could have done a lot better over the years. We are just now in the position that we are able to save a little.
That’s the main thing we are realizing that we should have done things differently. Now we are changing things.
I know this feeling well it can be so hard juggling the bills and hoping you have enough to scrape by once everything that must be paid is paid. x
Exactly it is so hard. It can be so frustrating at times.
Hindsight is 20/20. The beauty is that we ALL make mistakes and wish we would have done things different but there is always time to make a change. The best thing is that you have recognized some of the issues.
I agree and we can change some of the things before it is too late.
We are lucky enough to have a decent nest egg but I always stress when we have to dip into it for any reason. I think we have all had financial trouble at one time or another.
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Yes that is how I feel when we have to go into our savings for unexpected bills and things.
Now that I am back home working full time for my clients only and other people who hire me to be their ghostwriter, I am okay money wise. Sure some days I have less than other days but what I remind myself of and focus on is that I am doing this – from home – with three kids and single adult household …. and bills are paid, food is on table. That’s all we need 😉
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I love the way that you think. I totally agree. We are doing the best that we can. We are all alive and fed. Finances will be good sometimes and bad others but at we are all together.
I feel like there are so many things I could do differently. I really need to make a conscious effort.
Yes we are definitely trying to make more of an effort as well.
Finances are always so stressful. It feels like even when you make more money, more bills start to appear. It’s hard to ever get ahead. I wish you and your family financial luck!
Thank you so much. Hopefully we will figure it out soon.
It’s definitely a lot better to have planned financially but there are certain things in life that we prioritize as well. It’s understandable if you were not able to plan all of this, the important part is that you’re doing the best that you can!
Yeah doing the best that we can is really all we can do and teach our kids to do better.
I had no idea how expensive raising a family is. My parents had 9 children, my mom stayed home with us, my dad was a firefighter. I was given everything I NEEDED. Not everything I wanted of course, but all needs were met for all 9 of us. Now, I have 4 children and I thank God my mom taught me couponing, living frugal, etc. My hubby came from a family of 4 but was upper middle class. Together, we even each other out nicely.
Finances are tough.
Yes. I come from a family of 4. We had everything we needed as well. MY mom also did couponing as well. I am still learning how to do it.
It’s nice to know some people understand what I mean I don’t want the world just to be able to provide thank you
Having an emergency fund is so important. It is so hard to live on a single income. I know how you feel playing bill roulette. I am thankful we started saving for the kids education when they were little. They are both in College now.
Yes I really wish we had started our kids one when they were younger. College will be here before we know it.