Nishe’ turned 17 a few weeks ago. I knew it was coming but the day it came was like a swift punch in the stomach. I know, I know she has to grow up. Every time she turns a year older it means that I am a year closer to having to share her with the rest of the world more than I already do. It’s the same with Tyler. I have been all in my feelings since then.
I just keep thinking that she has one more year to be in my protective world. Where I can save her from some of her mistakes. Where I can be that cushion. She will have to go out and make her own decisions and learn from the results. This past weekend became the biggest realization that I had to let go. Nishe’ had something to do and it required her to have identification. I asked her if she needed it and she assured me that she didn’t. Well we found out differently when we got to the location. I tried to fix it at first. I tried to find a ride to go get her identification. Then I came to understand that it was her mistake and she was going to have to deal with it. Which meant doing what she had to do at another time. Simply because this is the path that she is on at the moment. She is entering into adulthood and eventually she is going to be out on her own. So she has to learn to prepare for things like this. She has to get herself together. I was so angry that I basically flipped out on her. Letting her know that there isn’t always an easy fix. I of course apologized later. But I just wanted her to know that her life is about to change in abut a year.
La La Land Mommy: Transitioning To Mom In The Background
Now I am trying to transition to being her mom in the background. I mean my role will be the same but I have to practice being quiet and giving advice only when it is absolutely needed. Trying not to always give my opinion and making decisions for her. She is my first baby bird leaving the nest.
I guess my real question I did her father and I do everything right for her. Were we too strict? Did we not give her enough opportunities? Did we give her all the tools that she needs? I guess we have no choice but to trust that we did. That she will do great in the world by herself. She is such a sweet, smart, strong, beautiful, and funny young lady. I know she will have to spread her wings. Heck I didn’t even want to send her to pre-k but I did it. I’m just going to have to prepare for the next chapter of my life and know that my baby girl will be okay. But will I be okay? I think I will survive but I’m still not ready.
