Every day I struggle with doing things. From a blog post to making decisions. It takes me forever to make a decision. I worry about everything. From am I wearing the right clothes to what I am going to eat. Well deciding what to eat is easier than wearing clothes. I literally spend hours wondering if I am making the right decision. If I go to an event I guarantee that whatever I am wearing it took me awhile to decide to wear it or I just got fed up with searching and wore the last thing or first thing I put on. I think that is why it is so easy for me to make everyone happy over me.
It’s something I feel a lot of us struggle with. Whether it is anxiety, ADHD, or depression that is the cause behind this indecisiveness, plenty of people have a hard time just as much as I do, if not worse. I read, saw, and heard plenty of advice on what to do to better. Some of the products that Vibes CBD have apparently helped people with this anxiousness (visit the Vibes CBD store here for more info). I wasn’t so sure to pursue such an option myself. I wanted to know what the cause of my indecisiveness was before I started taking steps to work on it. And it just so happened an off comment was what opened my eyes. One of my friends also suggested that I could buy cannabis oil or other similar products to deal with my anxiety. I’m still thinking if I should opt for that route.
I have a friend who I bounce blog ideas off of and just ideas in general. She told me one day “Katherine you seek validation in just about everything you do. It’s like you don’t want to make a decision unless someone tells you it’s the right one.” Until she said it I never realized how much I wanted people close to me to say Katherine you are doing the right thing. I of course denied it but later I had to admit it.
Now I am working on just making my own decisions and doing what is right for me. I don’t exactly know where needing validation came from. I think it started when I got picked on at school and started liking boys. It can be a real headache trying to get everything just right. Then when people are constantly negative towards you it can hurt your self-esteem. So for years now, I’ve been working on getting out of it. I have to do what’s okay for me and what makes me happy. But that is a struggle as well since I am used to putting everyone else before me. I was just comfortable with doing that. Maybe soon, I might have to search for the Best Online Psychologist and have a heart-to-heart conversation with them.
Walking around with this issue is so time-consuming and is really annoying. Every time I think I have gotten over it I fall right back into my old habits. No wonder a friend of mine suggests I take something from Serenity Store to help me relax, I go back and forth a lot. My husband has pointed it out to me as well. I try to get his validation on just about everything. Which as husband and wife I am kind of supposed to talk to him but I go beyond sometimes. He has literally on occasion had to tell me to do what I feel is best or do what I want to do.
In 2017 I just want to learn to trust myself more. Leave all my doubts and anxiety behind. I know it will take work and throwing myself in the deep end of the pool to do it but I am ready. I am fed up with dealing with these issues. I just want to move forward and succeed in whatever I want.